Anna is a very smart girl and says some very clever, funny, and sometimes touching things. I've been writing these "Anna Quotes" down for a while, and since I've started using Twitter I've been tweeting a few as well. Here are some of my favorites from the last few months:

• Answering her play phone - in one breath: "Hello, hi, what's up? OK, bye."
• To me, suggesting we get her mom: "Let's go look for your wife."
• After breaking a wooden doll at my mother-in-law's house: "I think she's broken, Grandma. She dropped her head off."
• In clothes she didn't like - with hands on hips: "I can't go out like this!"
• When the priest enters the church at the beginning of Mass: "Here comes Church Man."
• Describing her favorite parts of the mall play area: "The lighthouse and the train are the most funnest of all."
• And in reference to my mom - who passed away last fall: "Grandma Dolly is looking down on me and watching me play."

That last one got to me.

I remember those words from my childhood: "We are experiencing technical difficulties, please stand by." The words were usually accompanied by a test pattern, and hopefully after a few minutes the station would "resume regularly scheduled programming."

Well despite our technological advances over the last thirty years, we still experience "technical difficulties" from time to time. At least the graphics have improved:

Aw, isn't he cute? The Fail Whale, as he's commonly known, shows up whenever Twitter is over capacity. Expect to see more of the big guy during the World Cup.

As adorable as the whale is, I don't quite get the accompanying message. "Too many tweets?" Yes, I know that means too many Twitter users at once, but the picture suggests the opposite problem—not enough "tweets."

"More birds! We need MORE BIRDS!"

I'm watching a cartoon with my daughter tonight before she goes to bed. It's the classic Looney Tunes short Steal Wool starring Sam the Sheepdog and Ralph the Wolf.

"Morning Ralph."

"Morning Sam."

We've also watched several Road Runner cartoons together, and I'm surprised that she hasn't noticed the uncanny similarity between Ralph and Wile E. Coyote. When she does, I have an explanation at the ready: a theory I came up with when I was a kid.

Wile E. Coyote moonlighted as Ralph the Wolf in order to earn the money he needed to buy all that stuff from Acme.

Anvils don't come cheap after all.

"Goodnight Ralph."

"Goodnight Sam."

My wife Julia started a fun little game with Anna about a year and a half ago. Anna had just figured out how to pout to try and get her way, so one day she was pouting and Julia started tapping her index finger and thumb together like a bird's beak.

"Tweet, tweet, tweet . . . plppbt!"

"Wa Dat?" Anna asked.

"That's a bird coming to poop on your lip," Julia replied.

Soon Anna caught on. One of us would pout—as a joke—and she'd tap her index finger and thumb together.

"Teet, teet, teet . . . plppbt!"

"What was that?" one of us would ask.

"Da a boid dunna poop on ya lip!" she'd reply with a big grin.

One day I noticed that Anna had her lip sticking way out, so I decided to take it to the next level:

"Squawk, squawk, squawk!" I said, flapping my arms.

Anna pulled her lip back in and covered her mouth.

"I think I hear a condor!" Julia said.

Soon Anna picked up on the condor too, and the first time I saw her flap her arms and squawk I practically fell over laughing.

So why do I bring this up today? Well, after last night's Mid-Valley Willamette Writers meeting, I finally gave in and signed up for a Twitter account. I put it off as long as I could, but if I'm going to pursue this writing thing as a career and not just a hobby I've got to network, and the place to network is Twitter.

So after a year of resistance I've started tweeting. I just hope that my first impression of Twitter wasn't accurate:

"Tweet, tweet, tweet . . . plppbt!"

Wednesday, I took Anna to her favorite pizza parlor for lunch. She's not a big fan of pizza — she prefers the salad bar—but loves the pizza parlor's enclosed play area. It's perfect for both of us: she gets a safe place to play and I can keep an eye on her while I write.

As usual, I was sitting where I could see Anna play. She was in the ball pit with a boy and a girl both about her age. Suddenly, the boy picked up a ball and threw it at Anna. Understandably, she screamed her head off.

I got up immediately and ran in to get her. I gave her a big hug right away, then walked her out, and sat her on my lap for a few minutes to calm her down. Meanwhile, the boy walked out of the play area too. His mom called him over to the table.

"What did you do, Spencer?" She hadn't seen the incident.

He mumbled something in reply.

"Well you go over there and apologize to her right away," she demanded.

He resisted at first, but then gave in.

"I'm sorry," he said pouting.

"Thank you for apologizing," I said to him. He walked back to the play area. Soon he was playing with the other girl again.

"Are you ready to go back in too?" I asked Anna.

"Yeah," Anna said wiping a tear away.

I set her down and she ran into the room. The boy had returned to the ball pit, and Anna started to walk over to him. He said something to her, but I couldn't hear it. Suddenly she stopped.

Again, she screamed her head off. I went in and got her. I put Anna on my lap again and tried to figure out what upset her. The boy walked out too, and headed straight over to his mom.

"What did you say to her, Spencer?" she asked.

He mumbled something in reply, and his mom started laughing.

"What did he say?" I asked.

"He asked if he could throw the ball at her head," she replied.

Anna didn't get the humor, of course.

"That's not fun-ny!" she said. I can't help but laugh when she says that.

Anna was done playing, so we headed home. That night I told the story to Julia and the two of us sat down with Anna. We explained to her that while we understood why she screamed and cried when the boy threw the ball at her, she should have just told him 'no' the second time instead of screaming her head off again.

"So what do you say the next time a kid says something you don't like?" Julia asked.

"I say 'no,'" Anna replied.

"And what don't you do?" I asked.

"Scream off my head."